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Sagittarius

For January 2013

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The question is, are your feelings about yourself your own, or are they the collection of everything that everyone said about you, projected onto you, and conditioned you to believe about yourself as a child? You’re probably thinking: Well, I wish it was the first possibility, but I have a hunch that it may be the second. The question is one of context. Everything new that you’ve learned was fit onto shelves and into compartments that were established by the first few layers, and also by ancestral patterns. When you try to put new information into the context of old information, it’s often hard to tell which is which. That, in short, is the beauty of the current moment of your life; the old context is being dismantled (which can feel like falling apart, disintegrating, or being shattered, depending on the day). When the structure of your mind is changed so radically, that can feel disorienting and give you the sensation that you don’t know yourself, and that you don’t know what’s really important to you. The thing is, you do. Yet what you’re doing in this era of your life is learning how to perceive that self-knowledge outside the framework of what has been done to you, said about you, or sold to you. It matters not how well-meaning anyone was; the framework is a root of your loyalty to the heritage that you’re freeing yourself from, and the truth is, you will be a lot happier with your own original self-understanding.

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