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Papal Aspirin


Last Updated: 06/06/2013 6:47 pm

Marco, Every other day I walk to the Phoenicia Market to see the headlines. An 18-year-old guy I know usually works in the evenings. He has curly hair, and sometimes wears the t-shirt DYSLEXICS OF THE WORLD UNTIE. He always plays Heavy Metal music on the CD player, and tonight, as I looked at stories about the beheading of an American hostage, WASP (or are they spelled "W.A.S.P."?) were singing

The torture
never STOPS!

Heavy Metal has somehow become real.

Never Sad
"I am never
sad," Isaac
Asimov said.

"When I begin
to feel unhappy,
I write a book."

Bumper Sticker
Seen in Rosendale: STUPIDITY + RAGE = WAR

Cat urine glows under a black light, I just discovered.
(I am substitute teaching today.
A kid in an Ozzy Osbourne shirt told me this.)

P.S. I just learned a cockroach can
live up to 10 days without its head.

Zitgeist-the number of pimples
in a nation, at one moment

Papal Aspirin
Papal Aspirin was marketed briefly in the 1920s. The pills came with an endorsement by Pope Pius XI.

A nest
is financial.

Overheard Conversation
"I had to lose my virginity to become a sanitation worker. When I was 20 years old I applied, and the secretary said: 'No virgin can be a garbageman.'

"So my friend Pat set me up with a woman named Melanie. I bought her flowers, we had dinner. Then we went to her house and had sex. It was awkward.

"The next day I joined the Sanitation Department."

Delaware (DE)
New York (NY)

Reagan Rap
In the last 10 years of his life, Ronald Reagan grew quite fond of rap music. "It reminds me of vaudeville," he would say.
Someone gave him a Fresh Prince of Bel-Air record,
which he played over and over.

Sum Age
Add together all your ages.
For example, if you are 12, add
This is your sum age.

A Letter
Dear Sparrow,
How about this idea: a social-progressive lottery?
Millions of people play Lotto each day.

Suppose we started a daily gambling game which funded feminists, solar power projects, collectives in Latin America, etc.? Why must all lotteries finance the State?
Judy R.

Palindrome* Anecdote
A prince in India always left the door open, whatever room he was in. His servants began calling him the "ajar Raja."

*A palindrome, of course, is a word, song, or Tarzan novel that reads the same backwards and forwards.

Jesus Wigs
Though The Passion of the Christ was a success in many countries, only in Portugal did Jesus wigs become a craze. Derived from the Beatle wigs of the 1960s, these hairpieces allowed anyone to resemble the Savior. Thousands of the wigs were sold in Lisbon, and throughout the country. (Some stores also sold fake beards.) For several months, it was not unusual to see three "Jesuses" walking together on a Portuguese road.

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