in retrospect, she was too old to be fucking around in the car knew better than to kick the back of her mother’s seat swear at her younger brother while her father was driving. but the road was empty the sky was clear, and reason seemed to just float out the window to follow the birds. it was silly
to think that God wasn’t paying attention up there or some stern force that demanded utter subjugation under the rules of the road as stated in driver’s safety courses it was just silly to think she could get away with it.
when the tire blew and the car flipped and started somersaulting down the road she knew she would be the only survivor of the crash that she was going to have to live with this as penance for fucking around in the car. as she flew
out the open window and over the road, away from the car she knew that this would be the last time she’d see her family alive—their eyes wide in terror, mouths frozen in piercing, unending screams, hands working at seatbelt latches that would not open in time—she would hold this image in her head for the rest of her lonely, orphan life, knowing
it was all her fault.